life is hilarious

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i feel like i've been putting off writing this post for a while. partially because i've been so busy trying to adjust to my new reality, and partially because i've been enjoying the adjustment. 

my company folded the day after valentine's day. 

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to be completely honest, we all knew something was up. working at a startup means you're very in-tune with how the company is doing financially and weren't a huge company to begin with. and i don't think people are truly ready to lose their jobs, but we weren't surprised when he told us. it happened all in one day - we came in, worked for about 2 hours, were all let go + told that we had to pack up the office in about 4 hours. i didn't really process it until the following week because i had a trip to hudson that weekend that i wanted to enjoy as much as possible. 

immediately after the meeting, i had a brief 10 second moment of panic after we heard the news, and then i just started laughing. i had gained enough experience and was confident in my skills that i told myself it would all work itself out. i'm currently freelancing and while it's been an adjustment trying to find my daily bearings, i'm so fucking happy. it's hard work doing it all, but also incredibly satisfying. because i fucking know i can.

this was always the path i wanted to carve out for myself, but i thought i had a few more years before taking the plunge into full freelance life. this has forced me out of my comfort zone in so many ways, and i've had to make some difficult decisions within the last month or so. but the thing about being self-employed is that all bets are off and you can't depend on anyone else to tell you what to do. all a part of the game. 

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life is funny. i went into this year with all these plans and expectations, all of which were dependent on me having a salaried job. then life threw me for a loop and i went from being a cd to unemployed to a freelance marketing consultant in a matter of 2 weeks. i told myself at the end of last year that i had no intention of slowing down this year, and that hasn't changed in the slightest. i have to work 300% harder, but i'm feeling + putting out nothing but good vibes. 

i'm determined to make this last for as long as i can, and plan to enjoy every second of the ride. i've also had an incredible support system in my friends, family, and tom - something i don't take lightly and keeps me driven every day.

oh, and these photos were taken from a little day trip sarah + i took to the brooklyn botanical gardens. we plan on going back when everything is in bloom, but it was my first time going and i just found everything so beautiful. 

i have so many upcoming trips + things planned for this year, so stay tuned! and again, thank you for following along.

 

fighting + flowing

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hi friends. i know i haven't been updating much, but i also left any guilt from not posting regularly in 2017. 

life has been...good lately. and by good, i mean really fucking awesome. work hasn't changed much, and i love what i do enough to not let it become mundane. my sleep schedule hasn't improved much, but i'm working on it. but the biggest change in my life in the recent weeks is me discovering box + flow

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i discovered this GENIUS concept of a studio through my membership at the wing. i'd always thought i'd like boxing, simply because you get to hit things and it seemed like an excellent stress reliever - something i've always needed. 

i took my first class with the owner, olivia, and it changed everything. granted i was not prepared in any way for the class and got lightheaded for a few minutes, but i'd never experienced anything like the workout/yoga high i got from this place. a class that combines shadowboxing, hitting the bag, and yoga? i feel like i struck gold. 

but what i love most about this place are the people. no one's judging. no one is too big or too small. there are no mirrors, and you get called out if you look at anyone else during class. i love that. olivia made sure to create a space where judging people won't be fucking tolerated, where encouragement is key. when you're on the bag, they'll call you out but not in an embarrassing way. 

that one class inspired me to just completely change how i approach everything - from everyday tasks to my food choices. it's an amazing feeling, finally finding some balance. i'll keep you guys updated, but i feel like life is only going up from here. 

keeping it simple af for 2018

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

as cliché as it sounds, there's just something about ringing in the new year that has me ready to hit the ground running. 2017 ended on a good note personally, and i'm determined to keep up those ~good vibes~ in 2018.

like many, i'm always caught between working to establish routines and wanting exciting adventures. i've decided that this year, i want both. 

EXPLORE MORE

again with the cliché resolutions, but i traveled a healthy amount last year + would like to continue that this year. i used to see vacations as these big trips that require a plane ticket. but as i'm getting older, i find that day trips, weekend trips + staycations are just as exciting. i have a few domestic trips planned, as well as 1-2 international trips possibly happening this year. i also just want to continue to explore new york as much as i can because it's one of those cities where there's always something new to discover. 

HEALTHIER DAILY ROUTINES

ugh, i could go on about everything i should change about my routines, but i'm trying to keep it simple + focus on changes i can make that'll have lasting benefits. first, i need to establish a better sleep routine. (i can hear tom yelling "sleep study!" behind me) with a better sleep routine comes more time for me in the mornings. i'm definitely a morning person, and want to have more "me time" before heading into the office each day.

towards the end of last year, i unfortunately realized that i've developed a mild lactose intolerance. i'm still in the process of testing out what i can/can't have, but dairy isn't necessarily good for you anyways so i'm not too heartbroken. building on me cutting out 90% of dairy, i know that i need to chill with the damn carbs. i also just need to get back to cooking all my meals and be smarter about my snacking habits. 

in terms of fitness, the gym is great but i do better in high-intensity group classes. there's something about working out with a bunch of people that motivates me to push myself even harder, so i'll keep you guys posted on the classes i try, etc. i'm particularly looking into kickboxing (because stress) + might even try y7. i also want to stop using car services like uber + lyft less and make it a point to walk more. 

MORE TIME WITH FRIENDS + FAMILY

i feel like i missed out on a lot while i was a teller because of the weird weekday + weekend hours. now that i have a "normal job", i want to take as much advantage of my weeknights + weekends by spending as much time with my friends/family as i can. whether it be cooking dinners together, watching movies at the local theatre, or meeting up at the local coffee shop to get some work done, time with loved ones does so much for my mental health. 

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SAYING "NO"

one of the many titles of my non-existent biography would probably be "how being too nice fucks up your life". a little dramatic, but if you know me in person then you know that i've had trouble saying no in the past. but 2017 gave me opportunities to be assertive, and i took them all. i'm still slowly building my confidence, and with that comes having to work on saying "no" to people, projects, etc. i have a newly-found dedication to life/work balance, and don't want to spread myself thin anymore than i already have. 

USING MY DSLR MORE

part of it comes from not having a proper bag, but i let my dslr camera collect dust for way too long. i learned how to ~properly use it last year and the difference in my photos is night + day. i'll write a separate post about my experience in photography/editing, but i want to stop relying on my iphone so much + make it a point to shoot more. practice will only make you better, right?

BEING BETTER OVERALL

this entire posts comes down to me just aiming to be better in all aspects of my life. i know it'll require work, but i'm finally in a place where i can really start focusing on these things that i've put on the back burner. 

what are some of your goals + resolutions for this year? if you have any tips for me, feel free to send them my way! 

the photos in this post were taken during a lunch/catch-up date with my friend emma, who went back to france that same night. we went to old rose, which is located in the jane hotel where cafe gitane used to be. the food was great, and the interiors (as you can see) are very instagrammable. 

this time last year

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this time last year, i was signing off my job as a bank teller for the last time. i accepted a position as a community manager at a manhattan-based pr agency, and thought that my career was finally starting. i should've heeded those glassdoor reviews because six weeks later, i left that position. and then 4 days after that, i landed a better (and higher-paying) position at my current company. i went to lisbon, france, and monaco for a 5 day trip. it was my first time traveling to europe and traveling alone. i was promoted to creative director before i turned 25 this past september. and i'm going into 2018 with more career ambition than ever. 

this time last year, i was drowning in credit card debt. mind you, i didn't owe hundreds of thousands. hell, i didn't even owe tens of thousands. but what i did owe seemed impossible to pay off on a teller's salary and i'd be lying if i said i was nervous about whether i'd ever be able to pay it off. and i'm going into 2018 with zero credit card debt.

and finally,

this time last year i was debating on shutting down 'bursts of samm' for good. i was so focused on building my career that blogging was often neglected and to be honest, i wasn't doing it for the right reasons. recently, i was staying late at the office every night and started to feel worn out when i got home. and in those moments of exhaustion and silence, the idea of blogging slowly made it back to my mind and here we are. 

this year has brought me so much frustration, happiness, fear, anger, and excitement. but most importantly, 2017 brought me knowledge. i know so much more about so many things. work taught me important lessons about dealing with people, time management, and being assertive. last year i wrote a post swooning over the interiors at the wing and now i'm a member. i've met so many interesting and amazing people. each adventure has reinforced the idea that i want to live and experience as much as i can while i can. 

this time last year, i had no idea what the future had in store. this time around, i'm excited.